Death And Friendship

I got this article on drafts section. It was something that I had written about almost two years ago. I decided to publish it because I feel like it is still relevant .  Death is inevitable, it scares many of us and we really never want to talk about, for so many reasons. It’s an overly emotional subject for many.

It’s sort of  “taboo” to talk  about death, many people avoid the topic as they feel like its bad luck yet secretly think about it. “To dust we came from and to dust we will return,” or so it’s said. Whether we accept it on not, people will be born just as people will die that is nature.

About two years ago,  Achieng Abura and Grace Makosewe passed on and there were different stories that came out after their deaths. For those who don’t know, the late Achieng died at Kenyatta national hospital after a battle with gastritis and depression. Grace on the other hand was found dead at her apartment and the cause of death was not established, but according to media reports based on close friends and relatives, it might have been caused by depression among other  things.

It’s sad to think that such beautiful bubbly souls with such a big presence would be affected by depression as they seem to have everything going on well for them, but the truth of the matter is they are just as normal as you and I. They were human beings filled with love, sorrow, tears, sweat, joy and every other thing that we have. Just like us they has their shortcomings and their greatness because it’s human. But the sad thing is that, at their lowest points they had very few people around them.

We have become so busy with life that we have no time to check on our friends and even family. The excuse has always been “work , biashara, projects” etc. It is sad that we have made our jobs and making money so much more important that making time to foster friendships and relationships. Everyday we become more distant and drift further and further away from friends, family…  we have become ghosts.

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Let’s face it, the only time we meet in most cases will be during celebrations  baby showers, graduation parties, weddings and now funeral meetings. It’s now become common for people to ignore texts or not even call back when they get a missed call because we are “busy”. But the question is “What exactly are we so busy doing that we forget family and friends until when someone has been hospitalized or dead?” How long does it take to text someone to ask them how they are doing? Come to think of it,  How much does a text cost?

The late Achieng Abura’s son needed money to go abroad and get a heart surgery, unfortunately when she did a fundraising which less than 10 people showed up. Many people would like to think that being a public figure it would have been easy to get the money, turns out it’s not. If you were to ask yourself “Are you a good friend?”,  What would your answer be? If you were in dire need of assistance at this moment, how many of your so called friends would show up”?

There is one thing people need to understand, No one owes you anything so don’t expect anything from them. But that doesn’t mean that you don’t help when you can, it just means if you can, help someone help them without expecting anything in return. Building expectations will break our heart, do your part and go.

 Courtesy/ Geckoandfly

We are quick to post ” Reach out to your friends, they might be going through something” . But do we actually do it? I’m not saying that all don’t do it,  some do it regularly but a very large percentage don’t. Build friendships based on genuine love and support not because of what someone can do for you. Don’t look at people as a means to an end, look at them as humans in need of love, support and your presence.

Be kind, everyone is going through something, pretty sure you wouldn’t say no to a kind deed shown to you. So why not be kind to someone else? Many of us put on a front and smile and are always happy yet we are slowly dying inside. Some are going to open up, others they just don’t know how to so don’t be quick to say “You should have said something” because not everyone is vocal.

Don’t be that friend , sister, brother, relative who always says “It’s life, keep pushing on” , “you’re not the only one with problems”, “You’ll survive”, “You like complaining” etc . This includes men, don’t tell them to “Man up” . They need  a shoulder to lean on, a listening ear,  a helping hand and a non judgmental  soul.

When someone comes to you in as much as you aren’t  in a position to help LISTEN … Don’t judge just LISTEN. Sometimes all one needs is your presence and a hug and they will be just fine. Be there for someone today.

Ghosts Of The EX: Part 2

Nitah’s story about her EX was rather shocking to Ann as she wasn’t aware of some of the things that had happened to her friend. ” I waited for Frank to come over so that he could explain why he was with “friend”. Time seemed to be slower than usual, like it was frozen somewhere”, she said.

“Finally, he came in and hugged me but I was already agitated and he realised. He looked at me and asked, “What’s wrong love?” For a moment I wanted to flip, but then I looked at him and asked “What were you doing with her?”, . He looked at me shocked and asked: “With who?” I was now getting worked up because he was playing me for a fool.

“What were you doing with Tina? Or what’s her name?” He looked at me and denied that he was with her. At that point all hell broke loose, I was too pissed to contain myself. I cannot remember what I said to him but the exchange made me land on the ground with a thud after he hit me. ”

“He then came over and kicked me while hurling insults at me, saying that I am accusing him of things he hasn’t done. I couldn’t believe it, I just lay down there in tears, confused, wondering what to do. All this while he looked at me and finally he said , “I was with her, so what?” Then he stood and walked away as if I was nothing. At that moment, I did feel like nothing  a part of me died at that point.

After what seemed like forever, I stood up and went to the bathroom cleaned myself up , applied makeup ,picked my bag and left. I walked around looking dazed like I had no purpose. I cried at some point, but then remembered I needed to compose myself because I knew I was stronger  than that. So I wiped my tears got into a matatu and went home. I just needed to get away so I booked a bus and travelled the following morning.

Frank tried to call me, text, WhatsApp you name it but I didn’t respond. I needed to be alone to figure out the way forward, to do this I could not talk to him because I knew he would reel me in. He knew how to, and this time, I was done with his drama. I just wasn’t sure if I was done with the sex, though ….. but then I knew it would take me back to him so it was time to make  a choice.

I used to fantasise about the things he used to do to me .. I swear I could run back but it wasn’t worth the drama. He used to hold my body like a fine piece of crystal, gentle, soft and tender. He used to caress me as if he was checking out the curves of  a new route every single time. He was so careful with my body it turned me on even more … The thought of our sex life made me so tempted to go back to him enough times. She paused, deep in thought.

Unknown to Ann, for a moment Nitah had gone back to one of the many moments they had shared with Frank. She recalled how he used to make love to her and make her feel so whole …it made her smile. She recalled this particular time they had gone swimming together at a private club. After a long swim they went to the sauna together, it was late in the evening and everyone had

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left except the two of them.

They enjoyed each other’s company and shared banter  for a while before it got too hot for them. Frank hit the showers first before Nitah joined him, the bathroom wasn’t exactly big so they had to stay close together. They enjoyed the warm water and soon started playing silly games and body contact was inevitable.

Nitah grabbed Frank and pushed him gently on the wall, she kissed him as she slowly grabbed his neck as if to choke him. Sam liked it, he enjoyed every single moment of it. He slowly pulled her closer as the water from the shower slipped on their skin.

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The kissing got deeper and more passionate as did the fondling. At some point, Frank paused to hold his breath and  his eyes asked her  if she was sure she wanted to go down that road  … she smiled back coyly  to suggest something.

In that moment she started stroking his penis to give consent to his “suggestion”. They were an official couple and “house” sex was a tad too boring. The adrenaline they felt since they were in a public place made them even randier. The intensity of their passion and lust for each other was growing by the minute. Given the space they were in, they needed to get creative if at all they were to get intimate.

 

Cover photo: The guardian

The Ghosts Of The EX ….

 

Ann checked in about an hour and a half after Nitah had called her after she discovered the picture of a baby  in Sam’s wallet. The door was unlocked so she walked right in and made herself at home , I mean that’s what friends do right? She called out for Nitah who was in the bedroom.

They hugged and sank into the couch ready to catch up on lost time as they hadn’t seen each other for a while. But first they needed to eat something, Ann offered to cook as she needed to distract her mind from thinking too much. But she knew that one way or another she would have to share her troubles with Nitah.

They got to cooking, Nitah helped peel the potatoes as Ann prepared the chicken. She knew Ann was troubled but she also knew that she didn’t like to be pushed to talk so she began with banter about everything from  work to politics and some girly gossip. As they shared gossip Ann  mentioned that she had bumped into Frank; Nitah’s ex …leading to some awkward silence.

You see Frank is a topic that Nitah never wants to discuss at all, infact she had buried him as far as she was concerned well up until his name came up. For a moment, Ann was silent as she knew that  was a deep cut for her friend, but she gave the nod and told her to continue with whatever she had to say.Frank had asked about her, how she’s doing and wanted to know if she was dating. Nitah let out a loud hearty, sarcastic, laugh  and said “How dare he?, after everything he put me through? It’s all good, though, I already forgave him and moved on”

Ann cut in and said, ” That’s the same thing I told him, but he said that he will call you up sometime and set up a meeting”. “I don’t know exactly what it will be about but from the sound of his voice, he wants you back”. Nitah paused for a second, shook her head and continued to peel the potatoes. Seems that afternoon was going to be more interesting than expected and so she rinsed her hands off,took a glass  poured herself and Ann a glass of wine.

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She sipped on the wine slowly as they prepared lunch while making banter and catching up on a few things. She noticed Ann was avoiding to talk about what was bothering her despite the fact that she had asked her severally. But then again, knowing her meant that she will talk about it when she wants to, she let it slide.

After a while the food was ready, they served themselves and went to the watch TV as they ate. Nitah, had been awfully quiet and seemed to be in a world of her own. She jolted up after Ann hit her with a pillow. “What’s up with you?  What are you thinking about?”

“Hmmm, the truth is when you mentioned Frank, It brought back alot of painful memories. Some that I never even shared with anyone.” Ann looked at her concerned and put down the glass of wine. “Talk to me about it”, she said.

“Do you remember the time I had taken a trip to the village and went away for like a month?”, Ann nodded. ” Well, we  had a big fight with Frank and he ended up hitting me, that’s why I left for a while because I needed to figure things out. ” Ann looked at her in shock “Why didn’t you tell me?”, she asked her. “I wasn’t sure what to do with myself, I was confused , ashamed and hurt all at the same time. It was  a myriad of emotions, maybe a little too much for me to take.”

“You remember very well that we had been having issues ranging from possessive behaviour, jealousy; alot of insecurities basically. I just never thought it would go as far as physical abuse. Honestly, I never saw that coming. ”  Ann was visibly shocked and silent as she absorbed the information.  Nitah, continued “On that particular night, I had gone to his place as per the plans we had. I called in earlier but he said he wasn’t around yet but he was to be done in an hour and a half. So I finished up on a few things and headed there.

Fortunately, there wasn’t traffic and I was able to get there in a short while. About two stops to his place, I saw someone like him talking to a lady, it didn’t bother me until the matatu stopped and I looked again and confirmed that it was indeed him and guess who the lady in question was? his “friend” who had been the source of our fights because of how flirty they were. I just sat there confused wondering whether I should call him or not, alight and go to where he was , or just sit there and wonder.

I had so many questions in my mind at the time, “Was he was with her when he told me that that he wasn’t home?” “Did he just bump into her there? ” Were they together”? Sadly no answers would come at that moment so I decided to go and wait for him at his place. Only he could answer the questions in my head. Ann stood up and refilled their wine glasses, seems the afternoon was going to be a bit longer than expected.

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Cover photo: http://www.hdwallpapernew.in

Part Four : The Baby

 

Nitah wasn’t exactly sure about what she wanted from Sam either after that passionate night. Granted things were going on well, they enjoyed each other’s company and liked spending time together but there was no particular direction to follow. They were simply relishing the moments they had and that was it, at least for the moment.

Sam then woke up and sat upright looking at her with his ever so beautiful smile. “Good morning beautiful”, he said. “Good morning to you too, sleepy head”‘ she replied. At least there was no awkward silence or “what the hell happened last night” moments which made her smile deep inside. He stood up and tied a towel around his waist and boy wasn’t he looking extra fine than he did.

His body isn’t well chiselled like that of a fitness instructor, but he had a few muscles here and there and a small one pack to show that he was well fed. He was perfectly fit and needed no gym, well maybe just to get fit but not to get six packs or anything. His one pack suited him well. She also couldn’t help but notice a small”bump” below the navel, and  smiled coyly at the thought of his morning wood.

He went to the washroom washed his face and all then walked straight to the kitchen where Nitah had gone to prepare something to eat. He told her to go watch something and allow him to prepare breakfast for her as it was the least he could do since she had hosted him.

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She obliged to his request and showed him where everything he needed was, then she went to watch TV.

 

Sam did his thing in the kitchen and when he was done, he brought the food for them to indulge. He had prepared banana pancakes, sausages, tea and some fruits for afterwards. Nitah was grateful and dived in to enjoy the meal, the pancakes were heavenly and she teased him about it and asked what else he could cook. To her surprise, Sam knew a lot about food, something he had mentioned earlier on but she took lightly. Infact just to prove it, he invited her to his house and told her to pick a day she wanted.

Once they were done with breakfast, they sat there talking about alot of things as if they were on a journey of discovery. For a moment they seemed to be in their won bubble away from the world, it was filled with laughter, kisses and cuddling and it felt just right. Sam’s phone rang and it burst their small bubble, after a bit of a discussion he had to leave.

He dashed in for a quick shower and kissed Nitah goodbye then left, with  a promise to call later on. He explained that he needed to do something that had slipped his mind yet it was important. Nitah was now alone in the house and since she didn’t have any plans, she decided to catch up one some series she was watching. Unfortunately, she began having thoughts in the process and couldn’t even concentrate.

Now that they had crossed to the physical in a rather unromantic fashion, what was the next plan? What was Sam thinking? Did he think she was “random” or did he think she was a nice girl? If anything what was his plan? Did he just want sex or he wanted more? Thoughts seemed to come into her mind like floods and she just couldn’t stop them.

Welcome to Nitah’s world, for someone who likes to be in control she liked to know the where, when, how and what about any and everything. She did not like to be caught off-guard with surprises. She wanted to always have her guard on and stay on top of her game, but in this case, she was abit confused and she didn’t like it one bit. Despite the fact that they had bonded with Sam over time, she hadn’t managed to figure him out even a tiny bit.

For a moment, she wanted to call her friend Ann and share her thoughts, but then she figured it’s way too early for that. She went to look for her phone as she debated whether or not to call Ann, but then she realised that Sam had dropped his wallet. She picked it up and dialled his number, but it wasn’t going through. She tried again and it was busy and as she hung up his call came in.

He asked her if she had seen his wallet and she told him it was the reason why he was calling. He needed money, so since he couldn’t go back he asked her to Mpesa him and take the cash from his wallet. She sent him the money and as she wast taking cash from his wallet she noticed a picture of a beautiful baby, who looked exactly like Sam. There was no denying that this is his child…but why hadn’t he ever mentioned it?

To console herself Nitah said ” We just had sex nothing much, so he owes me no explanation and besides it’s not like he’s my boyfriend.” she then shrugged and put the wallet on top of the drawer. In as much as she wanted to let go of the image of the baby, she couldn’t … the mother of all things curious had entered her mind and she had to know who the baby was. She had to call Ann and get her opinion.

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She picked the phone and dialled Ann’s number, she picked up and they had a small chitchat. Ann who had been having man related issued, wasn’t exactly jovial and so Nitah didn’t say why she called, instead, she asked her to come over so they could catch up as Ann had her own share of drama to tell and this time it sounded serious.

Cover photo: Oprah.com

The Sexcapade : Part Three

 

After the The Sexcapade: Part Two,  Nitah and Sam had to stop and compose themselves because the guard kept knocking expecting them to come out, but she wasn’t about to let him see her or Sam in their birthday suit. Which reminds me, someone said no one is beautiful when they are naked. I disagree but that’s a discussion for another day.

While they figured out what to tell the guard, she dressed up quickly as Sam buttoned up his shirt. Seated and composed she rolled down the window slightly and her eyes met those of the guard. Turns out he wanted them to move the car as they had packed too close blocking the exit.  The smile on her face as the guard walked away was one she could never forget. But had the guard known what they were up to or did he choose to ignore? Well, it didn’t matter, because they didn’t really care.

Sam needed to use the washroom so they moved the car to a better spot and went up to Nitah’s house. Once in Sam was directed to the washrooms as Nitah rushed to the bedroom to take her bag. When she came out, Sam was standing in the hallway looking at the paintings on the wall as he commented on her exquisite taste. She smiled and walked to the kitchen to get him a glass of water as he had requested.

While she was in there a feeling of euphoria overcame her, and it must have been the reason why the glass slipped from her hand to the floor. Sam came in to check on her and for a moment she looked confused, he helped her clean up the mess and then took another glass and used it to fetch himself some water. She stared at him as he drunk and for some reason he made it look so sexy… Her mind then started to drift away again

Just then Sam poked her and she snapped out of it. He wanted to go but she wasn’t ready to end the night yet, she wanted to see his smile and hear his laughter even if it was just for a moment. She didn’t try to make him stay, so she walked him to the door. They stood there and recapped the night and laughed about being found by the guard. He stood there and as usual, he hugged her and kissed her goodbye but for some reason none of them wanted to let go.

They kissed in between “goodbyes” and five minutes later they ended up on the couch. There was a fire that had been ignited and needed more than a fire extinguisher to put off. The way his hands moved on her body was as in the same intense a potter works on his finest pieces. He knew just where there were curves, bumps and even how to make her “bend” into shape. What to touch, when to touch and how to touch it was an art he seemed to have mastered because Nitah was now his….

He removed her dress and made her sit on the couch as he kissed her from the neck going down… all she could do was moan with pleasure. The way he caressed her boobs was just enough to harden her nipples and excite her vajay. He slowly kissed her boobs, sucked her nipples as he moved down to her thighs. She wanted to fight him but for this moment, it was worth losing the battle. He parted her legs as he slowly kissed her thighs as knelt down and placed them on his shoulders, leaving his head in between her legs.

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He used his finger to slowly tease her clit, and from her moans, he was clearly hitting the right spot. She was getting to cloud nine, Sam was much sleeker than she thought, he gave her pleasure in bits and it drove her nuts. She wasn’t used to giving this much control to anyone but he was making her weak. Just as she wanted to gather the little strength she had to “take charge”, Sam inserted the tip of his tongue on her clitoris and flicked it just like a snake she was on another planet. They way he did it in pauses drove her wild and she eventually had a multi – orgasm. She needed a minute to gather her strength because she was just too weak.

He moved up and held her close to his chest, she couldn’t say a thing all she could do was smile at him. They cuddled for a while without saying a word, it was like a much-needed break for the both of them, a recharging moment especially for her. It wasn’t a competition but she just couldn’t allow him to leave her in such a vulnerable state. She needed to own the moment, just because she could and nothing more.

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They cuddled for a while before they started making out again, it seemed they weren’t quite done with each other. Nitah wanted to take charge, she was ready to go all out knowing that she had a chance to “F*&^” him like her life depended on it. She wasn’t ready to give mediocre sex, especially if she intended to have some around again… but did she want to?  Sam was already too hard, must have been because he didn’t get to cum as he was giving her head.

They slowly sat upright and Nitah sat on Sam’s laps… she continued kissing and touching him as he did to her. She mirrored his actions so as to be in sync with him and it brought them a much needed intimate connection. Eventually, she took his penis and rubbed her Vajay to “relax” the throbs but of course it was going to ignite the fire much more. So she sat on his penis slowly as it went into her…she let out a slow moan of pleasure and so did he.

She rode him slowly and increased her speed gradually, all while he grabbed her boobs and sucked her nipples something that seemed to drive her wild. She rode on him with occasional breaks … she would pause or hold when he was about to come. He loved the fact that she tightened her vagina muscles as she pumped slowly it drove Sam wild. That muscle contraction  tickled his head, it was like a “mini BJ” on steroids. Felt like someone milking a cow, only that her vagina contractions were “milking” his penis and it was Orgasmic!! to say the least.  Their bodies were so much in sync that they couldn’t hold it  any  longer they orgasmed at the same time.

They both went to the bathroom, Sam threw away the sheath and joined Nitah in the shower. It started raining and they decided that Sam should stay over. They then went to bed and blacked out almost immediately.

Nitah woke up the next morning wondering exactly what Sam would expect from her moving forward. The question is “Was she ready?”

Cover photo : Pinterest

 

The Sexcapade: Part Two

Continued from The sexcapade, Nitah completely loved to be in control ..on top of things in every literal sense and especially when it came to matters sex. You see for her, being vulnerable is one of the things she doesn’t like the world to see. She wanted to be seen as the alpha female, on top of her game and has everything figured out. At this moment, she needed Sam to “feel “ that she had power and can own the moment.

For a moment, she stopped to think about whether she was going ahead with the impulse or was she going to back off!! But then again her desire for Sam could not let her walk away from the fire that had already been ignited in her… she was ready to take charge. Slowly she reached out to her man, for that moment Sam was hers.

She slowly unbuttoned his shirt as he continued to kiss and fondle her breasts, in between soft slow moans. By now slowly but gradually she was taking charge. She slid her tongue into his mouth and twisted it up to touch the palate of Sam’s mouth slowly tickling it … he grabbed her at the back of the neck and pushed her towards him for a deeper kiss. That is the reaction that she wanted … You see kissing is not about the lips alone, you’ve got to explore the mouth well there are other sensual spots.

Image/Swoonreads

As they continued kissing, she unbuttoned his shirt and started fondling his nipples and slowly moved down as he kissed and bit his neck. She wanted a reaction and so far he seemed not to mind her antics. The neck is also a sensitive part and small pinch like bites (non-painful) arouse feelings and send the hormones into a frenzy. Sam moaned and Nitah enjoyed every single moment of it, she was beginning to take full control …. She was owning the moment.

 

Sam was quite the fighter and it seemed he was not ready just yet to hand over power … one thing they seemed to have in common. He now held her neck as if to choke her and started kissing her slowly, moving downwards as if to mirror her actions. He kissed her gently but with such intense that she lost her breath for a moment especially because his hand had slipped down to her clitoris.

His touch was magical, she felt it even in the way he fingered her. Slowly and gently he played with her clitoris as if it was soft music on the violin.. she loved it and for a moment  all she could do was moan for more.

But no, Nitah had a point to prove to herself she could not have a “vulnerable” moment . Not tonight, and certainly not in this moment. She needed to get back into the alpha mode and take the wheel. Her hands went down and unzipped his jeans. You see; she had felt the hard on but resisted the urge to touch it because she needed the foreplay to last longer. She also knew the temptation to have Sam’s penis inside her would be 95% higher once she touched him so she held off the thought but the time had come.

She unzipped his pants and held his penis in her hands.. it felt hard and full, all she wanted was to feel it inside her. She needed and longed for it but first, she needed to hear and see her man lose control. She stroked it slowly and gently as it filled her hand, she imagined all the naughty things she wanted to do to him and smiled inside…her dream was now happening.

Slowly she moved from his lap and bent over a little bit, she then put her tongue on his penis and swirled around it’s head all while stroking it gently. Sam was now slowly caving into Nitah’s power, the only thing he could do at that point was to play with her boobies and kiss her body as they were now both stark naked. Her body was a fine piece of art, he adored it.

Image/Goodreads

 

Her tongue licked his penis just as one would ice cream, slowly and carefully as she played with his balls. His world was now in her hands and she needed to take care of it well. He moaned with pleasure and Nitah knew he was caving in. His balls were warm and tender, she played with them gently as she closed in on his penis and let it fill her mouth. He was about to get some serious head game.

Slowly and gently she licked his penis, then gradually began sucking while stroking it gently. She never forgot about the balls, they needed love too. She still rubbed them and would occasionally lick them as she took breaks from giving head, to stop him from cumming fast.

Sam was now in a happy place; cloud nine and she loved every moment of it. She continued to give him head, stroking his penis and occasionally sucking the balls too. Eventually, Sam came but things didn’t end there.

They both wanted more, Nitah needed to feel Sam inside her. Just as they wanted to continue, there was a knock on the window, this time, it wasn’t an imagination. It was the guard and he would not budge, he knocked continuously.

Cover photo : Metro.uk

The Sexcapade …

 

 

She had met him a while ago at a party and they kicked it off instantly. They chatted like old friends and the chemistry just picked up like it had been there for years. The night got more and more interesting as their conversations were filled with giggles and  laughter.

I think she blushed too much and he knew the right words to say…or maybe she was just being coy and he seemed to like every minute of it. Her radiant smile seemed to make him even more confident and his dimples seemed to make her stare at him endlessly. This seemed to be a perfect match.

There was no one else at the party besides the two of them, well atleast in their minds no one else mattered as they seemed to be so caught up in themselves. Sadly like all good things the night came to an end, he escorted her to the cab took her number and promised to keep in touch. They stood they trying to have a little bit more of a conversation but Nitah’s friend kept beckoning her to get in the cab or she would leave her. Talk about cockblocking!!

Just like that, an amazing night had ended yet they both wished it would have lasted longer but it just couldn’t happen. They hugged for a minute and then went their separate ways. The silly smug on Nitah’s face couldn’t be wiped off even with the best eraser in the world. Her friend Ann, on the other hand, was a bit pissed because she had been kept waiting but that didn’t bother Nitah.

They got home and just before she dozed off a text came through,  it read “Hi Beautiful, I hope you got home safe. I have just arrived now, we’ll chat later. Have a beautiful day. Sam”.  The joy in her heart was just too much her skin radiated, she couldn’t believe he kept his word. It was Sam her new found friend from the party.

She texted him back and said “Hey Sam, Thanks, I got home safe as well. Heading to bed now, we’ll definitely chat later. Good day.” . She jumped to bed with the biggest smile on her face, she couldn’t believe her luck. Sigh! it did feel good and she wanted the feeling to last, but she had some sleep to catch and slowly she slipped into it.

Waking up to another text from Sam made Nitah’s day more interesting and soon enough their chats became regular. Sometimes they would call each other and talk for hours about nothing and everything. Their chemistry seemed to just flow, it’s like they were meant for each other. But the thing is Nitah was scared, she wasn’t exactly sure about what she wanted or expected from Sam.

Was it the fact that he was bold, confident and sexy? Or was it the fact that they had undeniable chemistry that she so, wanted to explore? Nitah’s thoughts were all over the place she just needed to figured them out. One thing was certain, though, their physical attraction was just too much and she knew her body wanted his…. now that’s where the trouble started. She unashamedly lusted for Sam, needed and longed for him.

That thought alone was enough to send her hormones raging, this was not a good sign. You see Nitah is one of those sexually liberated females.She goes for what she wants and makes it work. Before you become all judgmental, she is not a loose  woman. I mean she is the type that isn’t afraid to take charge in the bedroom, she knows what she wants and how she wants it and she will speak out if she feels like things aren’t exactly “nice”. She believes that sexual satisfaction should not be left to one person, it should be experienced by both parties.

Sam, on the other hand, was a polite and quiet guy,well for a while that is. As time went by, the two of them occasionally hooked up for  movies, coffee and went out clubbing every once in a while. Their physical attraction was so much and sometimes when they were out in public they would make out especially while under the influence of alcohol without a care in the world.

The two seemed to become closer as the days went by and this seemed to make Nitah’s lust for Sam more intense. She knew he wanted her too, she’d seen it in his eyes. The way he looked at her when he kissed her, the way he held her and even from their intense flirting moments. They both had a deep desire for each other, but none of them dared to pursue it …well that was until one night when all the care was left to sail in the wind.

They had gone out for  a swim and later on passed by a friend’s place for barbeque. Once they were done, they took a while to get into the car since Nitah was a bit drunk; she became stubborn. Eventually, Sam managed to convince her to get in and off they went , he was taking her home. As soon as they got to the parking lot, as was normal, he reached out to kiss her goodnight but then things got a bit too intense and they jumped to the back seat.

Sam being the gentleman he is, asked Nitah if she’s sure she wanted things to go down in this manner but she was too randy to even stop. The deep kisses, fondling, and caresses made her clit smile with anticipation. Tonight was the night that her vajay had been longing for, the pulses and thirst will eventually be quenched…

Image/riffy.com

Sure enough, they began kissing and petting each other heavily, the breathing got heavier and synched in with their impulses. The fact that the backspace of the car was a bit small didn’t seem to bother them. They were determined to make things work and to lay each other. Just as they got into the mood, there was a knock on the window or so they thought; but they ignored and continued kissing and touching each other.

Things got so heated up, he fondled her breasts and slowly sucked on the nipples as she moaned. The way he touched her made her feel so wanted as his warm ,soft, big hands moved around her body …. he knew just what to touch and how to touch it. She was on cloud nine …

He slowly turned lifted her  and placed her on his laps, he needed to see the beautiful work of art that she is. He slowly unbuttoned her dress, at this point, Nitah’s clit was pounding slowly in anticipation and he slowly rubbed her vagina ..all this while he kissed her neck and sucked her nipples interchangeably. Her juices began preparing the path , she was all wet and ready to go in ..but first she had to get him to want her as much as she wanted him at that point. Besides she liked it when she was in charge …. the control was such a turn on

Image/imaginekhh.tumblr.com

 

Cover photo:  http://www.popxo.com

 

 

 

Dear Life…. Here I Come

There are days I ask myself “Where did I go wrong?’’ because the odds seem to be working against me. I then look back from where I have come from, the journey, the trial , the tribulations and the growth I have made over the years and I snap out of it.

Sounds easy but its one of the toughest things you can do, it takes practice as well as discipline to be able to make yourself smile in the midst of a hurricane. Remember the days you used to pray for the things you have, how does it feel to finally have your own house,car, and an amazing career to boot? Isn’t it amazing? Do you know someone wants to have the same things you have? But yet you are here whining…

I was feeling so low today, I feel like I am getting frustrated as the days go by. My plan was to come home and cry myself until I feel better then probably take a nap. I could not cry in the office because then I would have to explain myself to everyone, simply because they are curious, Instead I opted to listen to Lecrae’s music and for a moment I was OK, I was reminded that there is a higher power and nothing is too hard if we believe.

But then sometimes I want to question God, I wonder why HE trusts me so much to handle certain things in life. I feel like I have failed in certain duties and roles that have been bestowed upon me. I feel like I have failed at times as my father’s child, as a sister , as myself and as a friend. I know I can’t always get it right and that feeling is at times overwhelming.

I feel that I have failed others, I may have embarrassed them in one way or another, I may have done them wrong consciously or unconsciously. Sometimes I wonder if an apology alone is enough, I know I am the least perfect person and that is why I always ask God to give me grace for my flaws. I know he hears me, sometimes I just wish things were simple and that HE didn’t trust me so much with all these roles. I am not so sure if I’m handling them well, but I know that I am doing my level best.

Dear life, I am sorry I cannot seem to get you right. I am sorry I let you down sometimes. Things may get tangled up and a bit tight, I ask you to please give me a way to do it. I will not ask you for the easy way out because there will be no lesson to learn. Instead, I ask of you to teach me how to be wiser, humble, stronger, patient, tolerant and above all teach me to deal with each day as it comes.

Dear God, I ask you to give me the strength to prove you right, to be able to accept and embrace the life and situations that you have entrusted me with. To be able to become a better sister, friend, and daughter and maybe someday a wife … haha, we are working on that last bit aye!!Thank YOU for the experiences as they have given me lessons in life that are helping me become better by the day.

I shall trust in the fact that YOU believe I am strong and live each day knowing that I am being prepared for better says ahead. Dear life, here I come better and ready to deal with you. HIS grace is sufficient enough for me to say Let’s do this!! Bring it on!! I am ready

 

Cover photo: thecord.ca

Gifs : Giphy.com

Hello …. My Name Is Single

I am pretty much used to waking up early by now, and by  5 am I am in the office . Incase you’re wondering, am not yet rich but I’m heading there and this my dear friends and readers  is a declaration. Can I get an AMEN!! Thank you.

Life can sometimes beat you down if you allow it to, thoughts can weigh you down and make you sad, lonely, depressed and unmotivated. At times depending on how you wish to look at things, you can either change them or wallow in self-pity which will not really do much for you. I’m doing this piece in between work so should I get mixed up don’t judge.

The other day we had a discussion with a few friends on why many people are single or should I say “single” and not in serious relationships. According to many, there are no serious people around to be dated and hence the single status of many. Before I continue, how many married or committed people do you know in your circle of friends? And how many do you know that are single or in “complicated arrangements?” I bet the latter wins right?

Speaking of which, scrolling through my twitter feed I came across something interesting. A rant by a certain lady, can’t quite remember the handle who was talking about the double standards that people have when it comes to women and sex. She asked “Why is it that women are called whores (PS. hoe is a garden tool) when they choose to have sex for the fun of it or simply to satisfy their desires? “Why aren’t men labelled, yet they do the same?”

I believe that many men and other women who judge these ladies do so to make themselves “feel better” and to assert some form of control. Basically, they make themselves feel “holier” by labelling others. The one thing that seems to bother men especially, is if the said woman “doesn’t catch feelings”. While it is ok for a man not to get attached the  woman he is sleeping with, it is not ok for a woman to do the same. Why? I don’t know.

The society has sort of; made it seem normal to make the woman  feel inferior, something which a lot of women are now up against and hence the growth of feminists. I am not talking about the feminists y’all keep fighting with over petty issues on twitter!! No, I am talking about women who know what it means to have gender balance; matters sex included. Not those who cry foul over petty issues and pulling the ” you’re saying that because I’m a woman” card. Topic for another day, though!

Sometimes you need to “woman up” and stop playing the victim to earn respect across borders. As a woman, if you feel randy by all means help yourself whichever way you want and let no one judge you, after all, you’re doing it for you, right?  Moving on …

Based on the discussion we had, there were various reasons why people are single and they seem to be same on both sexes. “Hii Nairobi hakuna watu wa ku date, watu wakona mchezo sana” . This statement almost got a round of applause from the guys, its as if everyone had an experience or two to share. One guy lets call him Frank shared his bad luck with the ladies he’s dated.

He met a lady, let’s call her Brenda at a party of a common friend and they hit it off so well. They chatted away through the night as others were busy drinking and dancing they engaged in deep conversation and as he put it “the chemistry was undeniable”. They exchanged numbers and kept in touch in days to come, a few meetings, dates  here and there and soon feelings were present atleast that’s what he thought.

Love is a dangerous thing, it clouds your judgement especially if you go in blindly, which is what may have happened in this case. Frank was sure he had found a girl with whom he would share his world with and maybe even marry. Brenda, on the other hand, was not too excited about it but he was determined that she would change her mind with time. Well time was there alright, Brenda wasn’t!! at least, not on the same level emotionally and mentally.

Long story short, after about a year and a few months they broke up. Brenda wasn’t ready to fully commit to the relationship, she was what I like to call “ex hangovered” ie. not over the ex. The thing about people who are still in love with their exes or still keep “friendly” contact with them, it makes things hard for them to move forward with other people. Despite warning from people Frank hoped it was a “phase” that would die, but unfortunately, it cost him a relationship, despite all his efforts to spoil her and make her his woman. The Same story was echoed by a female who’s potential boyfriend used to say “I am not ready” but she hoped at some point he would be. Never happened.

Many people tend to ignore signs and red flags from potential partners and for some strange reason they believe things will always pan out. Your intuition is NEVER wrong, it will never let you down so you might as well start listening to it. That inner voice, those thoughts that keep popping up in your mind… it’s not paranoia. Listen to it

In my opinion and I stand to be corrected when a person says they are not ready WALK AWAY!!! did you hear me right? WALK WALK WALK and never look back. The thing about being patient with this person is that they may never be ready for you if that happens How will you feel? When a person says that they are out-rightly telling you that they are simply not on the same page with you. So why waste your time?

Another thing I noticed within some of the stories given is the fact that not many of us know what it is that we want. We basically go out “trying to see how things will go”, that my dear friend will screw you up literally. You need to learn how to treat relationships like a business. If it serves you growth and makes business sense then by all means indulge, but if it doesn’t add value then you really don’t need it. If it don’ make dollars then it don’ make cents!! don’t waste your time investing in a place that lacks the same vision as you do.

While it is understandable to fear the unknown, settling for whatever comes your way isn’t the ideal solution.  Like I said before, treat a relationship like a business; always have a plan, strategise and action. A business cannot function on autopilot, same thing goes for  relationships . You need to figure out what you need to make things work and formulate a winning formula from the onset. Also a majority or y’all want to act single and still  be in a relationship, that just doesn’t work. Make a decision and stick to it.

On that note, you do realise that what you want in a relationship may not necessarily be what you need right? Learn the differences first then it will make things easier for you. As I let you ponder on that, should I publish the erotica piece in my drafts folder? Yes ?No?

It’s Not Important But …..

I had written a post about myself and some of my closest friends said that I had left out alot of information and so I have to do another piece. Well here it is, but I had told y’all that it is abit harder that people think when it comes to talking about yourself.

It’s like ten minutes to 2 a.m while most of you are asleep some of us are working late. Someone just asked me the other day “At what point will you get a husband with these crazy working hours you have? ” Haha Some people just make me happy. I have to admit something, I believe in marriage and I wish to have a good one like my parents have (ups and downs included ), but the rate at which drama, separation, and divorce is happening has left me a bit skeptical. So in case you’re wondering I am not exactly excited about marriages.

My BFF says that it’s utter nonsense since ever girl dreams of that moment they will “walk down the aisle to their prince charming. Myself, though ..errm I am not so sure, but it doesn’t mean that I have completely shut off the idea. It just means that I will let it happen when it happens. In the event that it does, best believe I will have it done at the A.G’s office and have a very serious after party where y’all can come make merry. Consider this your invitation.

On that note, Dear future husband you will need to know these things about me. I am a piece of art yet to be completed. The Artist is at work every day correcting some errors and applying new coats of paint on me. Sometimes the hues are not the right shade and at times, they become too dark. But HE never gives up on trying to make me the perfect piece that you will want to have and stare at for eternity. So be patient I am a work in progress!!

I am afraid of crossing roads, as old as I am it freaks me out each time I have to cross to the other side. If you leave me behind, I will wait for the road to be clear, which means you will have to either wait up or come back for me. Most of the time you will find that I will either hold your hand or run across the road like a child. I don’t remember where the fear came from but it is in me. Understand me, you are allowed to laugh.

I cannot ride a bike (Face palm) ok, technically I can but ok wait!! Judge me all yee. I cannot ride a bike. While learning how to do it, my sister pushed me and I fell off so I vowed never to try it again. Volunteers are welcome to teach me haha I can balance for a short distance I swear!! I hope that counts.

I am a foodie by birth because “Luhya”, haha we are known for our love of food. But I think I am a special breed. Allow me just list the number of things I do not eat so that incase I come to your house you don’t look at me like
Pizza , eggs, Mayonnaise, Yogurt, Mala, Fish, Tequila (Lol) , Should I Just say seafood is a complete No!! , Tartar sauce, Cake, Margarine , Butter, cheese etc. I can bite a piece of cake though but that is as far as it goes. Oh, I also use very little sugar and salt. If you don’t use enough salt in your food, I will not bother you to add. I told you guys I am weird right?

I love vegetables and NO ..I don’t eat salads or pudding for lunch. I eat proper ugali and managu or mrenda which I totally love. I am a very good cook, I wash my own clothes because it is therapeutic. Lol my workmates think its crazy, but I love it.

I am a very bad liar, simple trick If I have a grin on my face and I keep giggling just know I’m playing with your mind. I am a very hands on person, curious and open minded. I like to try out things. My ex-used to allow me to accompany him to the garage, I learnt quite a few things there like different tools and how to use them, how to change a tyre, refilling the radiator, removing the oil filter and how to tell when it needs to be changed etc basics but good lessons. Speaking of exes, why do y’all gotta show up when someone has moved on? It ain’t cool . Stop it if you’re those kinds of people.

I don’t like confrontations and drama, I lack the patience to deal so I strut away. The last time I dealt with such, I ended up in a fight. Unfortunately, I hit someone with a jiko! Don’t ask me how I lifted it and threw it but it happened. She’s still a very close friend, her name is Priscilla. We grew up together and she has a scar just above her eyebrow, if you meet us together she will narrate the story to you. I guess it was a misunderstanding gone horribly wrong, we moved on.

This article is just, well..not important but I just thought you should know I’m such a strange girl. Did I also tell you that I write about sex and relationships? Yes, I do. I will share details of that soon , or maybe I should do an erotica piece! Hmmm

Image/Giphy

Cover photo : Pinterest